Love: Don’t give up and never let it go

Love: Don’t give up and never let it go

If there was ever a time love really mattered, it’s now. That’s because if there was ever a time love seems to have vanished, it’s now. If there was ever a time we need to talk about the warmth and hope of love, it’s now. Don’t give up on it, and never let it go…

But if we can somehow keep our hearts and minds open, the power of love holds the potential to work wonders for us…

Maybe it’s just me. I mean, maybe I’m hypersensitive and hyperemotional. Maybe it’s because I live alone. Maybe I pay too much attention to the news. Whatever the reason, what I’m feeling is real – legit. At least it is for me.

I’m not liking what’s going-on around me. And I care enough – not only for myself – that it hurts. Maybe our friend just above is feeling the same.

Yes, I understand a lot of people aren’t showing their best faces, given the virus and disturbing social and political unrest. But that’s precisely my point. I’m stunned by those faces and the accompanying behavior – coldness, meanness, and hate.

People need to take a long look in the mirror. And I can’t be the only one who feels that way.

Being trained as a counselor it comes naturally to focus upon solutions – relief. Cute sidebar: my daughter calls on occasion with a pressing issue. Good old dad used to listen and blend-in potential solutions. Well, that was until she told me she just needs me to let her vent. Lesson learned (but I still toss-in ideas).

Anyway, when it comes to our current state of upheaval, I really do ponder solutions throughout any given day. And the only thing I can come up with – that all parties may at least understand – is love. 

Truth be told, what I really believe we need is something of a spiritual nature. But I can envision millions turning-away at its mention.

The power of love

power of love

I have always believed in the power of love. Perhaps we’re in the same boat. Still, there are so many that need to come aboard. And we’d “love” to have them, right?

Sure, the power of love can be one tough concept to embrace. Heck, who hasn’t had their share of love rejections and letdowns?

But if we can somehow keep our hearts and minds open, the power of love holds the potential to work wonders for us. It can help us feel so good – by ourselves and collectively.

But, of course, the absence of love can take us down to the depths of anguish and despair. And, to a great degree, that’s what’s going-on these days.

What can we do?

I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to take this societal, as well as very personal, misery sitting-down.

The first order of business on my side of the fence is self-protection. What good am I to anyone if I’m all dinged-up? I simply cannot allow the coldness, meanness, and hate to eat me alive.

None of us can.

Hey, if that means cutting-back on following the news, so be it. And when it comes to encounters with those of opposing views and closed minds? Why would I sign-up for that? I’m sure there are things you may want to ease-up on.

But you know what? Whether it’s within the context of personal protection or positively influencing others, I’m going to continue to believe in the power of love and exist in that belief. Knowing there’s something more mighty than the world and setting an example is an honorable way to live.

People, we can’t give-up on love, nor can we let it go.

One of my poems

If you follow Chipur you likely know I’ve written a lot of poetry over the years. I’d like to share one of my “love” poems…

Love Is Here

Trust me now
Hold me near
Let me kiss away that tear
‘Cause I’d be giving you my best
A solid rock among the rest

Quiet now and never fear
Fate would never leave you here
Where painful sorts could track you down
And masquerade would run abound

Stable world
Easy sound
Restless likes won’t be around
To complicate the darkest day

For love is here
To show
The way

For my money, that’s just one example of the power of love. I’m sure you can come up with more.

Let’s wrap it up

These are tremendously difficult times, aren’t they? And I wonder if you’ve gotten to a point where you’re thinking love – warm and hopeful – has vanished. Please don’t buy-in to that.

I continue to believe in the power – the presence – of love. Again (and again), don’t give up on it, and never let it go 

The poem I shared comes from my eBook, Feelings & Rhymes Through Treacherous Times

Maybe you’d love reading more Chipur articles. Going on 800 titles.

Our Teens & School Mass Shootings: Where Have We Gone Wrong?

Our Teens & School Mass Shootings: Where Have We Gone Wrong?

Being a teen in America is a dicey proposition. Sure, those years have never been the easiest, but school mass shootings have taken the accepted teenage plight well beyond tolerance. So where have we gone wrong? Let’s talk about it…

God only knows what it’s doing to our children’s brains.  Sean Parker, Facebook’s first president

Yes, there was a life-snuffing high school mass shooting at the hands of a teenager last week. But there was one three months before. And four more over the past 20 years.

It doesn’t take a social psychologist to tell us something is horribly wrong here – its causes and cures.

In my mind, it comes down to good old-fashioned common sense. But intelligentsia assigns it little credibility.

Now, unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve heard and read all sorts of calls to action – solutions, if you will. And the vast majority of them are gun-focused, including second amendment rights, armed guards in schools, metal detectors, etc.

Sadly, most of the lip-service is political posturing.

I’m telling you up-front, I’m not getting into a gun discussion here because it’ll serve no immediate purpose. Besides, “Where have we gone wrong?” runs so much deeper.

I believe American society is in so many ways “out-of-control.” How can it be denied? And, of course, this reality horribly impacts one of our most vulnerable populations – teenagers.

Am I prepared to put my money where my mouth is? Sure. But realize, I can’t include everything on my mind in just one article. So how ’bout these three biggies…

Social Media

Ever wonder if social media is causing problems for our teens? Late last year, Sean Parker, Facebook’s first president, had this to say…

I don’t know if I really understood the consequences of what I was saying, because of the unintended consequences of a network when it grows to a billion or 2 billion people and it literally changes your relationship with society, with each other.

God only knows what it’s doing to our children’s brains.

Not long after, Chamath Palihapitiya, former Facebook vice president for user growth, chimed-in with…

I think we have created tools that are ripping apart the social fabric of how society works.

The short-term, dopamine-driven feedback loops we’ve created are destroying how society works. No civil discourse, no cooperation; misinformation, mistruth. And it’s not an American problem – this is not about Russian ads. This is a global problem.

I feel tremendous guilt. I think we all knew in the back of our minds – even though we feigned this whole line of, like, there probably aren’t any bad unintended consequences. I think in the back, deep, deep recesses of, we kind of knew something bad could happen. But I think the way we defined it was not like this.

So we are in a really bad state of affairs right now, in my opinion. It is eroding the core foundation of how people behave by and between each other. And I don’t have a good solution. My solution is I just don’t use these tools anymore. I haven’t for years.

Palihapitiya went on to say he doesn’t use social media because he “innately didn’t want to get programmed.” Regarding his children? “They’re not allowed to use this shit.”

Obviously, I’ve picked-on Facebook. But you know as well as I there’s more where it came from.

Films, TV Shows, Video Games

Are you kidding me? The violent and sexual content easily accessible in films, TV shows, and video games are appalling and behaviorally triggering. And, believe me, I’m no prude.

No doubt, you can find all sorts of studies that will tell you such things have no negative influence on our teens, but really? Again, it’s good old-fashioned common sense versus intelligentsia. And, unfortunately, the latter most often carries the day.

How could fast and casual exposure to violent and sexual content in so many films, TV shows, and video games – immediately and over time – not have a tragically negative impact on our teens?

Zeitgeist

Zeitgeist: the general intellectual, moral, and cultural climate of an era.

I don’t know about you, but I think the current American zeitgeist is downright scary. And the two biggest contributors are an “anything goes” attitude and cold-hearted meanness.

Just consider the caustic rhetoric heaved-up by folk from any point along the political spectrum. And take a look at the comments on most any article, post, or forum thread. So much anger, cruelty, and disrespect.

The zeitgeist – the “spirit of the day.” In America, triggering fuel for our teens.

That’s It

You know, I’m sad for American teenagers. And that includes the victims and the perpetrators wrapped-up in this school mass shooting horror.

No doubt, being a teenager in America has always been difficult. But am I wrong in believing never like this? And let’s not forget, I’ve been around for almost 64 years.

Where have we gone wrong, people? And what are we going to do about it?

Time’s already run out.

As long as we’re on the subject of teens, these Chipur articles may hit home…

Our Teens Are Hurting and Dying: They Deserve a Lot More EMPATHY

Teen Depression in America: The Very Hard Facts (and Hope)

And there are hundreds more Chipur mood and anxiety disorder-related titles to peruse. Please, be my guest.

Living with Depression? Care from Afar!

Living with Depression? Care from Afar!

Sometimes when we are living with depression, we just need to know that someone cares. It doesn’t matter if it’s from afar, or even if we personally know the provider. Am I right?

Are you living with depression? Are you consumed with how to cope with anxiety? I think you’ll find some comfort here.

A lazy Saturday afternoon it is. Didn’t sleep worth a damn last night, with 45 mph winds pounding my bedroom window, and bunches on my mind.

So you know what? What better time to park it and write a chipur article just for you? And, yes, me.

I was perusing my poetry collection, and one I’d written 12 years ago jumped out and bit me on the nose. Don’t ask me why, but I knew it was the perfect poem to share with all who are living with depression and learning how to cope with anxiety — with an accompanying message, of course.

So how ‘bout some background?

My marriage ended 16 years ago. And any of you who’ve endured that nightmare know just how much it hurts. Some four years after all hell broke loose, I was well into my recovery. I became very active at a church, and befriended a couple and their children.

Oh, you know how these things go, they appeared to have the “perfect marriage.” Fact of the matter was, things had to be pretty rocky at home, because word got out that “Amy” was having an affair with a prominent church member. And it wasn’t long before the couple attended services and church activities together.

Understandably, no one saw much of “Rick” for a time. But with great courage, he began attending services again. Imagine, going to church knowing your soon-to-be ex-wife and her flame would be sitting just pews away.

Given I’d gone through a very difficult ending of a marriage four years earlier, I felt very badly for Rick – and, really, Amy, as well. And when I thought about their children, tears welled-up in my eyes. (Talk about living with depression)

On one particular Sunday, I was sitting at the back of the sanctuary – and Rick, sitting alone at the front, caught my eye. My feelings? Well, that evening I wrote this poem…

And I Know

I see you
You’re staring
And alone in a crowd

And I know what you’re feeling
Yes
I’ve warmed your chair
Worn and pressed your clothes
Scuffed and shined your shoes

I’ve cried your tears
And swallowed your pride
True

From this distance
I’d take your hand
‘Cause I know it begs to be warmed
I’d offer my arms
‘Cause I know you need to be held

If only you’d sense you’re not alone
You’d surely feel my prayer

But no
You won’t show and tell
Shame grips your tongue
Pain builds your walls
And rage shuts you down

And I know
You can be sure of one you could trust

Sitting here
Alone

Together

Now, your present circumstances may not exactly match Rick’s. But the need for connection, identity, empathy, care, and love – much less, a hug – transcends situational detail.

No matter where you are, if you are coping with anxiety, living with depression or whatever  it is that you may be enduring, please know someone’s thinking about you – even if it’s from afar, and you don’t personally know him.

Are you living with anxiety and depression? Are you consumed with how to cope?

Just know someone cares. It can work wonders in getting you through a difficult time.

Would you like to read more chipur Feelin’ Better articles like this one — Living with Depression? Care from Afar! —  then just tap here, okay?

P.S.  If you know of someone living with depression,then please share this article with them…they will thank you for it.